


Shopping Spree (Day 7)

by SaltySadness



Series: The Egos and the 31 Day Christmas Writing Prompts [6]
Category: Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series), Wilford Motherloving Warfstache - Fandom, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Absolute Nerds, Christmas Shopping, Day 7, I am a terrible procrastinator, I am so sorry about the delay, I decided that a special detective should make his appearance in the modern era, I had to skip 6 for now because I couldn't find any inspiration, M/M, Shopping Spree
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:49:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28185672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaltySadness/pseuds/SaltySadness
Summary: I am so sorry for the delay, some stuff was going on in my personal life that just drained any motivation to write for a solid week, and then school has been kicking my ass for the next week. I will be attempting to write multiple stories until I catch up on what I missed. Because of this, though, I may be doing days out of order in order to actually get stuff done.Today will be technically day 7. And Bim and Wilford have some things to buy, and old friends to meet up with.
Series: The Egos and the 31 Day Christmas Writing Prompts [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036356
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	Shopping Spree (Day 7)

There is one time of year where Wilford and Bim, notorious show stars and suspected murderers, go out in public willingly. And that day was today. After cursing Dark's suit into a fun Christmas pattern, Wilford quickly had to leave the house and give the love of his life a break from his shenanigans. Therefore, it was time for the seasonal holiday shopping with his buddy. Bim, on the other hand, was very much worried about this year. He loved Wilford, but even his friend in the police department couldn't hide all of his crimes. Well, if he even had a friend. Bim had yet to see a sign of this so-called 'possible ex-lover cop buddy' of his. Apparently, he traveled through time a lot? Regardless, it could be likely they would be recognized, so they threw on some disguises. 

Unfortunately for Bim, he had forgotten that Wilford had not a goddamn clue what it meant to blend in. Bim was wearing casual clothes and waiting for Wilford to show up when he looked up and felt his heart sink. This fucker was wearing an afro. It genuinely looked like he had just stepped out of the 70s. And now _everyone_ was staring at them. Bim was very embarrassed, and separated from Wilford as soon as he could under the guise of shopping for him. He hid out in a department store, though he did actually buy a set of gaudy suspenders. He found several gifts for the others, such as a pricy eyeliner for Dark and sewing equipment for Eric. 

It seemed to be going well for Bim until he left the store and heard a commotion. Damn it. He rushed to where the crowd was running away from and heard gunshots. How? He was certain even Wilford wasn't stupid enough to shoot in this public space. So who was? That was when he came up to Wilford and found him with a mysterious stranger who seemed to know him. The bald man appeared visibly angry, and glared right at Bim. 

"Another one of you?! Are you serious?! How many versions of you are going to pop up, Warfstache?!" 

Wilford didn't really react to Bim's arrival nor the stranger's words, grinning instead. "Well, it certainly has been a few years, old friend! When did we last meet? Sometime in the 90s?" 

" _No_ , it was..." The stranger hesitated, "Well I don't fucking know how long it's been, but I have been seeing you all over the damn place!" 

"Whatever do you mean by that?" 

"What- you ignored me and pretended not to have a clue who I was when I last saw you! You got mad when I grabbed your shoulder! You didn't even have a mustache! And there were two of you? It didn't make a lot of sense!" 

It was at this moment, Bim realized that this stranger had approached him and Yancy a few months ago. Yancy was the one who was grabbed, and quickly swatted him away. Bim had to drag the convict out of there because it turned out that the stranger was a cop. Was this Wilford's cop friend? Or ex-lover? Wilford was never clear on it. 

"And don't think I haven't been keeping tabs on you! Cannibalism, kidnappings and torturings, thousands of murders all made by different versions of you! I know you do personas, but you've taken it too far Warfstache! I'm taking you in now!" 

This was the time when Bim cleared his throat and got the attention onto him. "Yeah so... I'm Bim Trimmer. Wilford here isn't all of us. The last time you were around, you saw Yancy and me. And all those crimes were shared between Wilford, me, and the others." 

The stranger paled instantly. "You mean there's _more_ of you? Oh, sweet Jesus..." 

Bim rubbed the back of his neck as the cop put his gun away. "Yeah, sorry about that. So you're Willford's ex-lover cop friend-" 

"Stop telling people we used to date. We did not fucking date." The cop glared at Wilford, who sheepishly grinned.

"Alright, then. Wilford's cop friend Abe, right? He's mentioned you a lot. Apparently, you travel through time? I always assumed you weren't a real person." 

"Yeah, that's fair. And I'm not a cop, I'm a detective. Huge difference, y'know?" 

"Yeah, I know." Bim lied. He did not know the difference. 

"So what, are you his babysitter? You seem to be the sane one here. Speaking of which... which one of your clones is a cannibal? I was wondering when Wilford resorted to eating people." 

"Oh, that one is on me. I'm the cannibal." 

"...I'm sorry what?" 

"Changing the subject, would you like to come and meet the actual sane ones of the group? I'm just babysitting Wilford right now. Well, I was going to be until he showed up like _that_." 

"What's wrong with that? We met in this outfit when I was tracking him down for murdering our friends." 

Bim was surprised by this. What did that mean? For one, that outfit was terrible. And how did he meet Wilford in the 70s, but had mutual friends Wilford killed? He was about to ask when Wilford had a weird look on his face. Uh oh, that face meant he was experiencing one of his famous moments where he remembered too much and might have a meltdown. He grabbed Wilford by the shoulder and began pulling him to the exit, all the while texting Google. Google would have to get Dark. "Sorry, we have to go right now." 

"What? What do you mean? We were getting along just fine. How come-" 

Dark was immediately upon them, causing Abe to jump back. However, Dark's back was to Abe, and his stare was on Bim. The grey man was absolutely fuming. "Now, Trimmer, how the hell did you manage to upset him within a shopping trip?" 

"I know that voice. Damien?" 

Dark froze, turning slowly to confront the detective. "Abe? Ah, I get it now. Do not say another word." 

Without another word, Dark grabbed Wilford and disappeared, leaving Abe open-mouthed and Bim very, very confused. "Wait, did you just call Dark 'Damien'? Who's Damien?" 

"What do you mean 'who's Damien'? That was the mayor, Damien? William's best friend? One of our friends who was murdered? How is he still alive? Why is he grey? Where are Celine and Mar-" 

Dark's void cracked open, and Abe was dragged right into it. This left Bim with so many more questions. He quietly left the mall, pondering the limited information dropped on him. This required further investigating. First off, to learn who Damien the mayor was.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I headcanon that Eric would be into sewing. He would definitely love that and you can't tell me otherwise. 
> 
> At this point, days 1-21 have been claimed or are in the makings, as well as day 26. All the others are free for the taking (request wise). Ideas for day 6 would be appreciated though.


End file.
